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A Question?
Find all the answers regarding how ToGather works, its security, and its spirit here.
Find all the answers regarding how ToGather works, its security, and its spirit here.
ToGather is an authentic dating and meeting app that prioritizes connections based on shared activities and common interests. Unlike traditional dating apps, ToGather offers two complementary modes:
Our approach promotes real-life meetings based on shared experiences rather than superficial swipes.
ToGather is for everyone who wants to make authentic connections without commitment. Whether you are looking for:
ToGather is made for you! Our app favors meetings based on shared activities rather than physical appearance.
ToGather will offer a free version with the essential features to make authentic connections:
Premium features may be available to enhance your experience, but basic access to the app and its main features will be free.
ToGather stands out in several innovative ways:
The focus is on real experiences rather than superficial matches.
The ToGather community is built on values of openness, respect, and authenticity:
By joining ToGather, you become part of a dynamic community that values shared experiences and open-mindedness.
Your safety is our top priority. ToGather implements several measures to ensure safe meetings:
Coming soon: Possibility to create meetings open only to people with verified identity via an external provider (KYC)
Reporting or blocking a user, or reporting a meeting, is quick and easy:
Report a user: Allows our moderation team to review the behavior. The user is not informed.
Report a meeting: Allows reporting facts related to the content or progress of the meeting; the organizer may be concerned by the processing.
Reasons for reporting a meeting (examples): Inappropriate content, Misleading information, Problematic organization, Dangerous behavior, spam or scam attempt.
Important: Automatic blocking only applies to reporting a user, not to reporting a meeting.
Block a user: The user will no longer be able to contact you or see your profile. This action is immediate and reversible.
Important: In case of immediate danger, contact local authorities (police, gendarmerie) by dialing 17 or 112.
Identity verification (Know Your Customer) is a planned feature to strengthen trust in the community.
How it will work:
This feature will be available soon.
No, never. ToGather neither sells nor transfers your personal data to third parties.
Our GDPR commitment:
For more details, see our Terms of Service and GDPR policy.
ToGather applies a robust security architecture making your personally identifiable information (PII) unrecoverable:
Even in the event of a data breach (highly unlikely), it would be impossible to link the data to a specific person thanks to our anonymization system.
However, in the event that you seriously violate our terms of use, some data could be used for internal or legal investigations.
We only collect the data necessary for the service to function.
For the full and detailed list, please consult section 9 of our TOS.
ToGather offers two meeting modes to suit your desires:
Balanced Mode
Meet people who are like you. The algorithm favors profiles similar to yours (age, interests, background) for effortless exchanges.
Ideal for comfortable meetings and discussions on common topics.
Discovery Mode
Step out of your comfort zone! The algorithm maximizes diversity by connecting you with people with backgrounds different from yours. This is the very essence of ToGather: enriching your perspectives through social mixing.
Ideal for discovering new points of view, broadening your horizons and experiencing the unexpected.
With each invitation received, the meeting mode used is indicated so you know what to expect.
Not yet, but very soon! You will soon be able to choose to receive invitations for a particular mode so as not to receive invitations in vain.
The change will take effect immediately for the next invitations you receive or create.
Our app doesn't just rely on chance. We use an AI-augmented probabilistic matchmaking engine designed to maximize the richness of exchanges while ensuring your safety.
Maximization of Multidimensional Dissimilarity
Unlike classic algorithms that seek similarity (homophily), our system models you as a unique point in a complex vector space (age, opinions, origins, etc.). We calculate the "distance" between participants to form high-entropy groups.
More simply, we assemble the furthest profiles to create the spark of discovery, rather than the comfort of "déjà-vu".
Iterative and Dynamic Construction
Our groups are not fixed instantly. A stochastic worker (our organizing robot) proceeds in batches (batches of invitations). It analyzes the group's composition in real-time with each acceptance and recalculates subsequent invitations to balance the group equation.
It is a continuous optimization until the ideal configuration is reached.
Security Heuristics and Hard Constraints
Diversity must never compromise security. We apply hard constraint filters before each invitation. These predictive algorithms detect and block statistical configurations considered "at risk" (such as social isolation or obvious power imbalances) to guarantee caring cohesion within the mix.
Yes, the algorithm adapts to your chosen mode:
In both cases, security heuristics remain active to ensure safe and harmonious meetings.
The response time depends on the nature of the meeting:
These short deadlines allow groups to be formed quickly and prevent meetings from remaining vacant.
Tip: Turn on notifications so you never miss an invitation!
If you do not respond within the allotted time, the invitation automatically expires and is considered declined.
Don't worry: the first 3 unanswered invitations do not affect your received invitations statistics and you will continue to receive other invitations. We understand you might be busy!
Yes! ToGather allows you to be passive (receive invitations) or active (create your own meetings).
To create a meeting:
If the organizer cancels a meeting you are registered for, here is exactly what happens:
Immediate Notification
You receive a push notification informing you of the cancellation. This is the only app event that triggers an immediate push notification — joining, leaving, or ending a meeting does not send one.
Recovery of Your Quotas (confirmed participants only)
As a registered participant, your two counters are restored:
Example: If you had accepted 3 invitations (limit reached), the cancellation brings you back to 2/3 — you can accept an invitation again.
The organizer's creation quota is not refunded
Unlike participants, the organizer never recovers their meeting creation slot — whether the meeting is canceled, ended, or deleted. Each creation definitively consumes a quota until the monthly reset.
Cancellation Conditions
The organizer can only cancel if:
After this time, cancellation is no longer possible to avoid last-minute withdrawals.
Good to know: If you voluntarily leave a meeting (and not following a cancellation by the organizer), your limits are not refunded — they will remain consumed until the next monthly reset. Choose the meetings you accept carefully!
ToGather provides compensation situations to ensure fairness when a meeting does not go as planned:
Meeting without invited participants or without acceptance
If you create a meeting and no user is invited within the time limit, or no user accepts the invitation, your creation quota is refunded. You can thus recreate a meeting without penalty.
Sole participant in a multi-participant meeting
If you find yourself the only participant in a meeting that was not planned for a single participant, you are compensated on your quotas — and the organizer too. This double compensation guarantees that neither party is penalized for a situation beyond their control.
Once you are a confirmed participant in a meeting scheduled for day D, ToGather will send you no new invitations for another meeting taking place on that same day D.
Why this rule?
Meetings have variable durations, and locations can be far apart. Receiving an invitation for a time slot you cannot honor would unnecessarily consume your received invitations quota — without the possibility of accepting.
This rule protects your quotas and prevents you from receiving notifications for meetings that would have a time or logistical intersection.
In concrete terms
Good to know: This limitation applies only to received invitations. As an organizer, nothing technically prevents you from creating a meeting on a day when you are already participating in another — but we recommend you plan carefully!
ToGather uses two different search radii to offer you suitable meetings:
"Instant" Radius
Maximum as-the-crow-flies distance for meetings taking place the same day.
Example: If you set this radius to 5 km, for activities taking place the same day, you will only receive an invitation if the meeting takes place within a 5 km radius around your current position.
"Scheduled" Radius
Maximum as-the-crow-flies distance for meetings scheduled in advance (from the next day to D+14).
Example: If you set this radius to 20 km, you will receive invitations for meetings planned in the coming days located up to 20 km from your home.
Generally, users set a larger "Scheduled" radius than "Instant", as they have time to travel for a planned meeting.
You define your radii during your registration, but you can change them at any time:
The new settings apply immediately to future invitations.
GPS location is essential for ToGather to function:
Privacy: Your exact location is never shared with other users. Only the matchmaking algorithm uses this data to offer you meetings close to you, respecting your predefined radii.
ToGather values your engagement in the community through a transparent and fair ranking system, recalculated automatically every day.
Calculation of Your Activity Score
Your score is calculated on your last 3 months of activity according to this formula:
This score reflects your dynamism: the more you create, accept, and participate, the more your score increases.
Ranking by Geographical Percentiles
Your score is then converted into a percentile (from 0.01 to 100.00) by comparing you to other active users in your:
Interpretation: A percentile of 0.01 means you are the most active in your group (rank 1), while a percentile of 100.00 indicates the last position. The lower your percentile, the better your ranking.
Users with identical scores receive the same percentile, ensuring fairness for ties.
Why This System?
This ranking is not a competition, but a way to:
It is a recognition of your contribution to the ToGather ecosystem, not a grade of your personal worth.
Update: Your statistics are automatically recalculated every night, taking into account only your last 3 months of activity. If you have been inactive for more than 3 months, you temporarily disappear from the rankings until you return.
Tip: To improve your ranking, create meetings (maximum impact of 3 points), accept received invitations, and stay active regularly on the app!
No, absolutely not! ToGather is designed to respect your time and well-being.
No hook, no pressure
Unlike traditional dating apps that encourage you to spend hours on them, ToGather works differently:
You can also be proactive and create your own meetings whenever you want.
No infinite swiping, no time wasting: ToGather takes care of finding the ideal people to share a moment with you.
ToGather is based on a notification system to inform you of invitations in real-time.
Important: Without notifications enabled, you risk missing interesting invitations, especially for instant meetings (30-minute deadline).
How to enable notifications:
Push notifications alert you to important events: new invitations (via the matchmaking system) and meeting cancellations (immediate notification). However, no notification is sent when a meeting is created, naturally ended, deleted by an admin, or when you join or leave a meeting.
Yes, ToGather is completely free!
All core features are accessible without any payment or subscription. You can create a profile, receive invitations, create your own meetings, and participate in activities without spending a dime.
Optional paid features may be offered in the future, but basic usage will always remain free.
To ensure a pleasant and safe experience for everyone, each user must respect the following rules:
Code of conduct
Prohibited behaviors
Failure to follow these rules may result in the suspension or permanent deletion of your account.
Check our full terms of service for more details.
Immediate actions:
Our moderation team reviews all reports and takes appropriate action quickly.
To guarantee fair use and avoid abuse, ToGather applies monthly limits on certain actions:
Standard User Limits
Premium or Ambassador User Limits (contact us)
Reset: Your limits automatically reset 1 month after your first action (creation or acceptance of an invitation)
Tip: Creating a meeting allows you to receive 2 additional invitations and accept 1 more! Your limits are updated as soon as the meeting is over. If you are active and create 2 meetings per month, then you will be able to participate in up to 7 meetings per month for free (2 organized and 5 joined)!
The creation quota is never refunded
Unlike invitation quotas, your meeting creation limit is never restored, regardless of the outcome: cancellation, natural end, or deletion. Each meeting created permanently consumes a slot until the monthly reset — organize them carefully!
ToGather understands that you may sometimes inadvertently miss an invitation. That's why we have implemented a joker system:
Joker System
You have 3 jokers per month for expired invitations (unanswered in time).
Example: If you received 6 invitations and let 5 expire without answering:
Important: Turn on your notifications so you never miss an invitation!
For security and traceability reasons, certain sensitive information has modification limits:
Modification Limits
Why these limits?
These restrictions aim to:
Email verification codes: When changing an email, you can receive a maximum of 2 verification codes per 24-hour period.
The limits reset system is automatic but works differently depending on the type of limit:
Monthly Usage Limits
Trigger: The reset date is set during your first active action (meeting creation or invitation acceptance).
Reset: Exactly 1 month after this date, all your usage limits return to 0.
Modification Limits
Each type of modification has its own independent counter:
Concrete example:
You create your first meeting on January 15 → your monthly limits will automatically reset on February 15, then March 15, etc., as long as you remain active.
Automatic check: A system checks users eligible for a reset every hour and updates their limits automatically.
When you reach a limit, the app clearly informs you:
Limits Reached
Solution: Go Premium or ToGather Ambassador!
The Premium subscription offers you much higher limits:
Tip: Create meetings that fill up successfully to unlock additional invitations!
Usage limits serve several important purposes:
Community Protection
Fairness and Balance
Security and Traceability
Our philosophy: ToGather favors the quality of meetings and community safety over the quantity of interactions. These limits reflect this commitment.
If your account has been blocked, it means a violation of the Terms of Service has been detected or reported.
In your message, include:
Our team will review your request and reply as soon as possible.
You can delete your account at any time from the app:
Warning: Deletion is final. All your data will be erased in accordance with our GDPR policy (maximum retention of 30 days for certain legal data).
Also: Any attempt to abusively delete to bypass usage limits may lead to sanctions, including the banning of your potential future accounts.
Modifying your profile is easy:
Your modifications take effect immediately and will be taken into account for future invitations.
Note: It is not currently possible to change your first name.
For any question, technical issue, or assistance request:
Email: [email protected]
Our team strives to answer all requests within 48 business hours.
For frequently asked questions, check this FAQ first - you might find your answer immediately!
ToGather will be available on:
Launch planned for the end of the first quarter of 2026 in France and Belgium.
ToGather is optimized to minimize battery consumption:
The app doesn't need to be constantly open, which preserves your battery.
No. ToGather is designed to be lightweight:
The app consumes on average less than 10 MB of data per month (excluding extreme cases).